I just realized I am too lazy.I grew up having my mum correcting my grammar all the time. Every English exam, I find myself asking her the same thing:-Is it"I have"... "There are or there is"... "Oh ya Ma is this plural or singular?" ...it is always the same thing, and my mum knows her daughter too well , yet I don't hear a single complaint from her side , she patiently answers my questions. I wouldn't say I don't know my grammar , but it is more of reassurance. I feel much more confident having my mum reassuring me it is correct and I think she knows it too. Even too skip classes , I have gotta inform her , it is as if when she approves it , I am more at peace.Honestly , I can never understand myself! Confidence is something that should be growing in me every year , but it just seem to be fading away in myself!And the thought of moving my ass and flipping through the vocabulary dictionary doesn't seem so fancy , so I would rather have my mum answering my questions.She is more like my walking dictionary! The other dictionary I had in life was my politics and life dictionary.Well , I only had it for 21 years. Then,all of a sudden , it just disappeared into thin air one day and now I am hanging in mid-air, taking my own initiative and learning everyday, from the so called hands on experience that life provides me with----- more like in the making of my own dictionary on life! By the way, I was referring to my dad. He had always been my "quick reference" when it comes to politics. Let me see , I never know more than who is the prime minister of my country. For further information on my country's political hierarchy, dad always comes in handy and he too knows it well. I often get the answers for my questions and it almost always ends with the same line " Ruby ma, u should no about politics, read the papers more..." and needless to say my response had never changed too for the many many years , it is always the serious nodding from my side , and yet what do I do? Nothing! I ran back to him each time I need to know something. And he too knows it well , that I never did what he told me, but he never fails to do so cause that is what daddy's are meant to do-- give endless advice to a stubborn and lazy daughter! Since he left , I am trying my best to learn on my own , though I sometimes go back to my sister for some fatherly advice. Though thank god, I am still surviving because I have my English dictionary with me!